How to Increase Your Effectiveness in 2 Steps

 

Step One- Become self-aware.

Everyone has unconscious ways of being and acting.

“It’s a paradox of life that the more conscious we become of what limits us, the more limitless our life becomes.” Author unknown

About 20 years ago, I enjoyed a daily exchange with  a peer coach, an executive at a community college. We listened to each other's  shared current challenges, then created an affirmation as a gift. Repeatedly, I noticed that I began every call saying, “I’m frustrated with…”

It was as if “being frustrated” was my favorite way of being!

Years later, someone said, “Ana, you sigh a lot!”

I had no idea! Frustration….still coloring the background of my thoughts.

We each have a way of being that we assume unconsciously. (This is a human thing to do!)  Here are some typical “favorite ways of being” that can zap you of your power.  See if one of them fits you, lurking in the back of your mind, behind your thoughts, and inside your speech and actions:

  • Frustrated                  
  • Martyr                        
  • Suspicious                        
  • Victim                 
  • Resentful                   
  • Sarcastic        
  • Defensive        
  • “Pissed off”                  
  • Disconnected                  
  • Anxious                          
  •  Distrustful            
  • Superior                     
  • Critical            
  • Righteous    

                                                                                                                                                                                                                

Consider asking others around you what they notice from how you talk and act. (It takes guts to do this!) Give them permission to be straightforward with you. Then thank them when they do, and determine if the feedback is worth considering. You might ask still another person!

 

Step Two   Choose how and who you want to be!

Each minute of each day, you can choose how and who you want to be. Write it down. Keep it in front of you. Proclaim it. Tell someone. Set an alarm (really!) with a reminder to check yourself. Choosing a way of being such as compassionate, creative, powerful, self-expressed, collaborative….will bring you amazing results! AND the effectiveness you want as a leader!

“It is our choices, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” -- J.K Rowling.

For a complimentary possibility session with me to see how you can increase your effectiveness, schedule time on my calendar. Click here.